I have always been a writer.  For most of my life I haven’t written for people to read.  I put pen to paper because I was made in the image of a God who used words to call this world into existence, and He used words to call me to Himself.  Before I was formed in my mother’s womb He breathed into me a mind and heart for reading and writing.  Out of all the talents He could have given He chose a spirit that yearns to take twenty-six symbols and turn them over and over again into pages of what I’ve never considered an ordinary story.  Once in a while, when I would let them slip out into the universe, people told me what I wrote was a gift and asked me if I would please do it more.   I’m just now barely brave enough to put my name on it.

 

 

 

I Am No Victim

I Am No VictimI am having trouble finding words. Following each new trauma it’s taking me longer to recover, and I see pieces of myself disappear completely. There is scar tissue in my heart and mind where a rejuvenation simply may not take place. I am frustrated. I wish I didn’t have to keep writing, but I must […] Read more...

Quote Queen

"Start with the soul and perhaps the temporal gifts I want to exercise will have their chance; and if they do not, I have the best in my hands already, the only thing really needed.  God must be in all my work."  --Flannery O'Connor

Enter your email address to receive notifications of new posts by email.

 

11 Comments on I Am No Victim

  1. Melissa Collins Hall
    August 10, 2018 at 12:03 am (3 months ago)

    Thank you for fighting so that I’m not alone. I’m praying for your relief. I’ll be in Arizona mid October. I do hope I get a chance to see you again. If you need me, call. Sending love. 💜

    Reply
  2. Rhinda Hayden
    August 10, 2018 at 1:28 am (3 months ago)

    I will see you soon, dear friend! And yet, here is another blessing in the midst of the pain as you have encouraged me deeply through years of our family’s suffering, and I have longed to meet you and to somehow say “Thank you!” If there is ANYTHING we can do in Hershey to help you, please do not hesitate to ask!

    Reply
    • Monica
      August 10, 2018 at 11:30 am (3 months ago)

      I will be so glad to meet you!

      Reply
  3. Lori
    August 10, 2018 at 7:08 am (3 months ago)

    🙌🏼❤️ I love you.

    Reply
  4. John Thomas
    August 10, 2018 at 7:14 am (3 months ago)

    I’m coming to Tucson in January to visit some friends and record an album in Sedona. Maybe I can see you then!

    Reply
    • Monica
      August 10, 2018 at 11:28 am (3 months ago)

      Ohhhh yes! I would so love to see you.

      Reply
  5. Rebecca
    August 10, 2018 at 7:26 am (3 months ago)

    You are not alone. I just spent from June 13 through July 30, inpatient more than out, at Hershey for the exact same reason. My lp shunt kept coming out. 4 revisions. I had a port implanted. An LP and so many CT scans and x-rays that I’ve lost count. My mantra became Psalm 27:14. “Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the Lord.“
    Be vigilant about wearing the abdominal belt. It makes such a difference. The bedpan will become your friend. You cannot push too hard after the surgery because the muscles just don’t always heal right. This is the time to focus on yourself for a while. Something that can, as a mother, go against every single emotion you have. You have to be healed to be strong for them. You’re not being selfish to take that time. The fourth revision is holding for now. It does work. Have faith, be vocal, an advocate for yourself, have courage and the Lord will strengthen your heart. Many blessings to you.

    Reply
  6. Kim Sproles
    August 10, 2018 at 9:08 am (3 months ago)

    Love you beyond measure!! Praying for you always. Praying for Arizona where you can be well.

    Reply
  7. Paula Gamble
    August 10, 2018 at 11:56 pm (3 months ago)

    Praying, dear one! You inspire me so much! Sending so much love! May God strengthen and sustain you and your family!

    Reply
  8. Caryn Christensen
    August 12, 2018 at 6:49 pm (3 months ago)

    Left a prayer in Messenger. Oh how I am praying…for ALL of this…for ALL of you. xxoxx
    And hey! Arizona is a whole lot closer to CA!

    Reply
  9. Susan Barone
    August 20, 2018 at 1:27 am (3 months ago)

    Love this song and will keep playing it over and over. You are covered in prayers. I pray for your surgery and healing as well as safe travels.

    Reply

Leave a Reply